Head over heels.

Head over heels ♥

Saturday, January 05, 2008

I've decided to stop doing my project for now.

Well, I've got a friend who thinks that I've not been a good friend. 8 years. Left me thinking, was I that lousy ? I never knew that I meant so little because my friend meant a lot. I thought this was one of the longest & strongest friendship I have. Up till today, then I knew, it doesn't seem to be. So all along, I've never been a good friend. I was just someone that was there to pull my friend down, to lower my friend's self-esteem and to crash my friend's ego. I have never been someone that my friend could talk to. I was just there to mock at my friend, insult my friend and never listened to my friend's troubles and problems. I was just there to spoil my friend's day, just there to make my friend feel worst. My friend is someone who have seen me grown from Primary school till now. I feel extremely comfortable with my friend around. I try my best to speak up for my friend whenever I can. I tried giving my friend things that my friend wanted even if I have got to beg someone else. I thought what I did was enough but apparently, no, it was never enough. I never realised that what I have done is never enough for my friend.

Actually, who cares about what I have done for my friend ?
Sometimes I do things for my friend without having my friend to know about it.
I just needed to know that my friend is safe and I'll back off.
So now since that my friend is already in a comfort zone, grown stronger and that my friend doesn't care anymore,
I'll back off.

I feel lousy as a friend.
I failed as a friend.
I apologise.
I think you mean too much that is why, I cried.
Don't befriend me, I suck as a friend.